Life is too short to be anything but happy :)

Isn't it amazing how time flies? I cannot believe it's almost March! Between nursing school, family and friend time and continually fighting the losing battle to catch up on sleep, weeks have slipped into months. I have almost finished my first year of nursing school! It's been a journey that's for sure. An incredible one though. I feel it a huge blessing to have been able to begin my nursing career so soon after high school. So many of my classmates have spouses and children that require their time and attention as much as the demands of nursing school; I don't know how they do it! As I have started clinicals and have started applying the theory we have studied the last four months into real- life situations, I find that I am loving it more than I ever dreamed I would. There is nothing more satisfactory than easing the fear of your patient before they go into surgery, holding a patients hand while their IV is started, or congratulating a father who has tears in his eyes as he holds his new baby girl for the first time. To say that nursing is a rewarding career would be a severe understatement. My new- found favorite sound in the world is the sound of the fetal heart rate monitor whooshing away as I walk by the rooms of laboring moms in the labor and delivery unit. It always puts a smile on my face :)

Along with the many new and exciting concepts and practical experiences I am learning in clinicals, I am discovering the demands of nursing on my sleep schedule! During our Gunnision rotation, I would have to wake up at 2AM and travel 2 hours south to Gunnison, work a 10 hour shift and then return home. For those who have ever lived with roommates- especially in an old apartment building with poor insulation- will know that these apartments are NEVER quiet until at least 1AM. This was fun :) haha. It was so worth it though. Several of us in our clinical group have been pretty sick since those last two weeks though due to the lack of sleep. I had the neatest experiences in Gunnison. From seeing my first C-Section, to removing staples from a man's leg, to admitting and assessing patients in the E.R, to having a physician consult with me about a patient as if I were the patient's RN, I learned SO much. One nurse that I worked three shifts with, had me completely take over her shift and she told me she would be there if I had any questions. That afternoon after admitting a patient to the E.R, she said, "Okay, now you go call the physician." I was so nervous! She really had me do everything that she would do as an RN- with the exception of IV medication :). It was exciting and a great experience. Although rural hospitals are small, I was able to see more and participate in care more than I would have in a larger hospital.

This last week we completed our Payson rotation in obstetrics and pediatrics. I now know more than ever that this is where I want to be in the nursing field! I love labor and delivery. I love newborns and caring for them. I love watching couples become new parents, and I love watching those sweet little spirits enter the world. During the 3 births I've seen so far, I've had to fight back tears every time. There are no words really to describe it :). It's neat and also funny to me to be able to answer questions of the new moms about their own care or the care of their newborns when I am an unmarried 20 year-old in nursing school haha :). It is fun for me.

As I continue this school year watching my dreams come true, I am amazed at the love and the happiness and joy that there is to be felt and experienced. As I have stressed through another year in school, the simple truth that this life is meant to be enjoyed has kept a smile on my face. I have felt that to be true more so now than in the past. I am the biggest worrier, and the words of Elder Perry have often comforted me when I have needed a stress- relief,

"Perfect love casteth out all fear."

As soon as I remember the love the Savior has for all of us, my overwhelming ordeals turn into seemingly meaningless ones as those words help me look at my problems with a more eternal perspective.

As a new year is under way, I find that it is already difficult to keep my resolve to do better and to be better in many aspects of my life. I find comfort and hope in the knowledge that we are not expected to reach perfection in the near future, even in this lifetime. As I read a book from a friend about the Atonement, it isn't about who finishes the race first. Those who win are those with the firm determination to make it to the end, those who stand up and keep running every time they are knocked to the ground. At first, I didn't like the analogy of life being related to a race. I already feel I am racing too much, racing away those tender moments we each experience every day and then so quickly forget.

If we constantly focus only on the stones in our mortal path, we will almost surely miss the beautiful flower or cool stream provided by the loving Father who outlined our journey. Each day can bring more joy than sorrow when our mortal and spiritual eyes are open to God’s goodness. Joy in the gospel is not something that begins only in the next life. It is our privilege now, this very day. We must never allow our burdens to obscure our blessings. There will always be more blessings than burdens—even if some days it doesn’t seem so. Jesus said, “I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.” Enjoy those blessings right now. They are yours and always will be.” – Elder Holland

I remember though, my institute teacher sophomore year relating life to a race; explaining it as a time where our endurance is tested, a time where every second counts, a time that is limited and a time where we exert every effort to showcase the best that we have. I also liked this aspect that he related about the race; the aspect that we have so many loved ones in the "crowd" cheering us on. We know that we are never alone in this life. We know that we can have the companionship of the Holy Ghost, we know that we have church leaders and the scriptures that never will lead us contrary to our destination. These are great. But, I also like to imagine my great great grandparents, my brother Andrew who I have never met, my sweet mother who I miss and love so much. I imagine them watching and cheering and that gives me hope and comfort. I have found that anything is possible if I just take things one day at a time. I love this quote that I found in an ensign article. It says,

“Even the mundane and repetitious can be tiny but significant building blocks that in time establish the discipline and character and order needed to realize our plans and dreams.”

There is so much to look forward to, there are so many reasons  to be happy, yet it is SO easy to be overwhelmed by the many things that have to be done. I have decided that it is only necessary to be happy always. To remember the countless blessings that Heavenly Father so richly gives every one of us. When I am happy, I think less about myself and in that state of mind is where I am truly the most happy. When I am caring for my patients at clinicals, when I am celebrating the success of my roommate or watching my mom teach in church or playing with my sisters, this is where I am the most happy. After all, Carl B. Cook says,

 "We must look up and step up. And as we do, I know we will cheer up, for God wants us to be happy" :)